I Have a Dream

I believe with all my heart in the incredible power of dreams. Compelling dreams give us hope, inspire action, unite people, and empower generations. They give way to new technologies and innovation. They give us something to aim for, something to focus our attention and intention on as we stumble down the path of life, trying to figure out who we are and why we’re here.

I want to tell you about my dream. And I want to hear about yours. (If you don’t know what yours is, maybe I can help.)

My dream evolves as I grow and change. It takes on new and unexpected shapes and colors as the next steps of my journey reveal themselves. I don’t know if my life in the future will look anything like what my dream looks like now, but I know for damn sure that it motivates me to move in that direction.

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined." - Thoreau

Here are some things to think about while capturing your dream in case you’re inspired to do yours too.

1. Practice gratitude. Before (and during and after) envisioning what you hope to create,  remember to be grateful for what you have, right here, right now.

2. Be present. While being inspired by your vision and letting it pull you forward, remember to live your life in the present, conscious and connected to the world around you.

3. Invest in the process, let go of the outcome. While going confidently in the direction of your dreams, remain open to new information and opportunities. Course correct as the next steps of your journey reveal themselves to you. Let go of having things show up looking a certain way. Be more interested in the essence of what you want and the journey toward it.

4. Think outside the box. Let go of any limited ideas of what’s possible and dare to let your imagination run free. You might be surprised what you come up with.

"Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand." - Albert Einstein

5. Take bold inspired action. Once you get clear on your dream, don’t forget to get out there and do something about it. Action creates energy and puts the wheels into motion.

Here is my dream as it stands now. I’ve divided it into categories and written it in the form of affirmations (i.e. in present tense statements, as if they’re already true.)

Family
– My relationship is a badass partnership. We are committed to authenticity, kickass communication, and living our fun, crazy lives to the fullest.
– I am deeply connected to my family, despite geographical limitations. I travel to see them often and we embrace technology to keep us close when we’re apart.

Career
– I have a killer team of talented people who believe in my mission that help me run my global business (e.g. virtual assistant, accountant, coach, mentor, PR, web design etc.)
– My business is an expression and an extension of who I am at my core. It reflects my purpose, values, passions and what makes me unique.
– I inspire, empower, and challenge people. The value I create for them is lasting and transformational.
– I have clients who fly me across the globe to work with them.
– I have written a book (maybe several) that tells my story and shares my message in a clear and compelling way, inspiring those who need it most.
– I positively impact large numbers of people not just through my own writing, speaking, coaching, videos, workshops, and retreats, but also through appearances on radio, TV, and live events.
– I surround myself with movers and shakers who believe in their dreams, rule breakers who challenge the status quo, and change makers who are quite literally saving the planet.
– I spend a lot of time outside my comfort zone, embracing failure, stretching my limits, and doing things that scare and excite me.

Money
– I attract and create more wealth than I personally need and am able to donate time and money to supporting and empowering the people, organizations, and causes I believe in.
– I have reached my milestones of being a 6-figure, and ultimately a 7-figure business.
– I spend money mindfully, creating a fun and fulfilling – yet sustainable – lifestyle for myself, my family, and my friends.
– I have a great money team (accountant + financial advisor + money coach) who help me make smart decisions.

Mind-Body-Spirit
– I eat clean 80% of the time (leaving 20% of the time for enjoying the delicious “bad” stuff), drink a ton of water, and get lots of sleep.
– I love and accept my body as it is, celebrate its uniqueness, and playfully test its limits.
– I seek out physical activities and types of movement that make me feel alive.
– My skin is radiant, my hair is healthy, my body is strong, I am glowing with happiness.
– I shine brightly from the inside out. I feel grounded, confident, and at peace.
– I regularly engage in mindfulness practices (e.g. yoga, meditation, gratitude) that quiet my mind, center my spirit, and open my heart.
– I stay intellectually stimulated and pursue continued learning and experiences by reading voraciously and attending classes, workshops, conferences etc.

Lifestyle
– I spend most of my social time doing fun and interesting things with people I love, creating meaningful connections, laughing often, and loving fiercely.
– I host frequent dinner parties, cook delicious food, and consciously create community.
– I travel the world for work and play. I am a mobile world citizen, always seeking to broaden my horizons, become familiar with the unfamiliar, and spread joy wherever I go.
– I make time to honor my passions (e.g. dance, music, languages, culture etc.)
– I am solar powered + water inspired, so I spend plenty of time in the sun and water.
– My wardrobe is a reflection of who I am: simple, classy, fierce, and playful.
– Though I travel often, I have a home base somewhere beautiful, near water, that is warm and welcoming, where friends and family eagerly come to visit.

Our World
– Through our collective wisdom, new technologies, and social responsibility we are finally figuring out how to save the planet from our own ignorance and overconsumption.
– A new brand of leadership is emerging. People are stepping up, working together, and love is winning over hate.
– Discrimination based on gender, sexuality, race, religion, socioeconomic status, etc. is outdated and nearly obsolete. We are experiencing a shift in consciousness and evolving into a more heart-centered and open-minded people.
– Western and Eastern medicine are being integrated into a more holistic healthcare approach. Doctors are in partnership with their patients. Quality healthcare is available to everyone, regardless of their ability to pay.
– Common sense, respect for mother nature, and compassion keep us grounded as we develop new technologies and enter an exciting new era of rapid innovation.

This week on The Fierce Leadership Call we were talking about taking radical responsibility for ourselves and our world. Someone made a comment about random acts of kindness and I’ve been thinking about the invisible impact and the ripple effect of kindness. It reminded me of the “Kindness Boomerang” video below, which captures the essence of my dream for our world: love, respect, compassion.

If you take nothing else from my sharing my vision with you, take this: Be kind to each other. Protect each other. Help each other. Love each other.

Tapping into the Divine Feminine

I love my tomboy tendencies. They’re a huge part of who I am and I embrace them. But lately I’ve been craving more divine feminine in my life too. Being one of the guys is a safe place for me. It’s great, but it’s well within my comfort zone. Stepping more into the divine feminine is out of my comfort zone and therefore also aligned with something I’m working on this year – taking bigger risks.

What I’m longing for is not just femininity for femininity’s sake, but rather tapping into the divine feminine.  To me the divine feminine includes the full spectrum of timeless female energy and can show up in all different shapes and forms, genders, sexualities, etc. The common thread is that it’s really real. It’s deep, vulnerable, mysterious, raw, intuitive, bold, magnetic, compelling, and healing. It draws you in with its irresistible beauty, magic, and power.

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I declared 2014 my year of intentionally tapping into and coaxing out my own divine feminine – kicking and screaming if needed – while also actively seeking it out in other women. Not surprisingly, the universe smiled, nodded, and coughed up a handful of opportunities. Looking back, the first quarter of this year has been all about the feminine for me. Here are some examples.

Joyus

don’t know a damned thing about online shopping. And I’m hardly an expert when it comes to fashion. So, naturally I was caught off guard when online shopping network, Joyus, invited me to be a guest on their talk show. Luckily, it was for a life organization segment and I got to present my simplify, prioritize, clarify philosophy. Being surrounded by fashion and beauty experts definitely put me outside my comfort zone, but I think I managed to be myself and just own it, because most of the feedback I’ve gotten was that I came across as authentic and grounded. The experience strengthened my resolve to start making my own videos (which I’ve been putting off for months because it feels like a big huge scary risk.) Here’s the clip, if you haven’t seen it yet. 

Spinsters

As you may have noticed I get pretty fired up about public speaking. Over the holidays, I was asked to be a featured speaker at a Spinsters general meeting. I felt totally confident about my talk but being in a room full of dolled up girls made me hyper aware of how out of touch I’ve been with my own feminine side the past five years while working in fitness. It felt good to just notice this without judging it. As I was standing at the podium at the front of a room with 100+ young women staring back me, I took the opportunity to soak in as much of that uniquely female energy as I could.

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Electric Woman

My good friend Nikki Armytage, whom I’ve written about before, asked me to co-lead a handful of calls with her for Electric Woman this spring. We’ve only just begun this journey and the connections happening in this group of smart and ambitious women are already blowing me away. When you create a sacred space and ask for vulnerability, magic happens. Can’t wait to see how it all unfolds. I suspect I’ll learn a lot from them these next few months. Nikki’s work is going to take the world by storm, by the way. I’m sure of it. Keep an eye out for her book.

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Red Heart Collective

When I was asked by Heather Spurrell, who I’ve been admiring from afar for ages, to be one of the original contributors in her digital magazine I was excited, since Real Women Whole People is very much aligned with everything I stand for. Then, when I saw the names of the other contributors, I was humbled. To be included amongst the likes of Amy Smith of Joy Junkie fame, who is a total badass, and Karen Kimsey-House, co-founder of CTI and one of the pioneers of the coaching industry, felt like a tremendous honor. My piece is called Unleash the Beast and can be found on page 16. Click the image below to hunt it down.

Real Women Whole People

So, my year of tapping into the divine feminine is off to a pretty good start. And I crave lots more. I want more badass women in my life to learn from, grow with, and look up to. I want to see more and more of my own feisty femme come out to play. I want to explore all the mystery and the power that being a woman has to offer and see what happens when I do.

 

 

The Possing Manifesto

I present to you: The Possing Manifesto.

You always have a choice.

Take radical responsibility for every part of your life.

Don’t compare yourself to anyone else. Respect their journey and live yours.

Be present. Be grateful. See the beauty all around you.

Don’t fear your emotions, feel them.

You are a feisty beast. Run wild and be free.

Every day is an adventure. Play hard.

There is nothing more badass than being who you are. Own it.

Stand tall, make good eye contact, and speak up. Your voice matters.

Be courageous. Fail gloriously. Let go of looking good and getting it right.

Clarity and self-awareness are key. Know who you are and what you want.

Prioritize self-care. Put your own oxygen mask on first.

Live on purpose. Seek aliveness.

Create more than you consume.

Invest in the process. Let go of the outcome.

Say what you mean. Mean what you say. Speak your truth.

Ask for help when you need it.

Replace judgment with curiosity. Replace jealousy with inspiration.

Respond intentionally, instead of reacting defensively.

Take bold action. Action creates energy. You can course correct later.

Never assume. Just ask. Keep it simple.

Come from a place of love, compassion, and respect. Always.

Be authentic, vulnerable, and real. Connect genuinely.

Do meaningful work. Work hard but hack life and be smart.

Be a resource. Be helpful. Be kind. Be generous.

You CAN change the world. Go do it.

I wrote this manifesto for The Twenty-One Day Momentum Challenge

My Top 10 Core Values

When I honor my core values I feel grounded, vibrant, and alive. When I don’t honor my core values, I feel imbalanced and uneasy. Sometimes even physically uncomfortable. 

I believe that getting clear on our core values and honoring them is an integral part of the journey to living a happy, fulfilling life. In order to honor our values, of course, we need to know what they are. In an effort to become crystal clear on my own values, I finally compiled a list. 

Here are my top 10 core values (in no particular order) and what they mean to me:

  1. Clarity – know who I am, what I want, what I’m about, and why I’m here
  2. Self awareness – know myself intimately (strengths, weaknesses, passions, quirks)

  3. Authenticity – be unapologetically me, vulnerable, raw, and real and own it completely

  4. Personal freedom – be in charge of my own experience, know I always have a choice

  5. Radical responsibility –  be 100% responsible for my thoughts, actions, and impact

  6. Radical honesty – say what I mean and mean what I say, be direct, and be clear

  7. Respect – let go of judgment, be curious, be compassionate, accept others as they are

  8. Connection – seek out, embrace, create genuine connections with others, soul to soul

  9. Simplicity – let go of what isn’t serving me to create space for what’s most important

  10. Adventure – choose to make my life an adventure every day, spread joy, be playful

This list will continue to evolve as I do. But understanding what I deeply believe guides me to actively create a life aligned with who I am. When I take a wrong turn, I simply refer back to my core values, reevaluate, then course correct.

Through this process, I am learning to 1) quickly recognize when my values are being stepped on,  2) calmly set boundaries and stand up for myself, and 3) be true to myself most, if not all, of the time.